No clear “so what”: States a fact rather than an argument or opinion. - Henri Matisse was considered, with Picasso, one of the two great artists of the twentieth century., Too broad or general: Topic is too large to discuss effectively in one essay. - Crime is too prevalent in our society., Too specific: Narrowed so much there’s nothing left to develop. - Getting into Disneyland on Saturday during Labor Day weekend can be difficult., More than one main idea: Combines two or more claims, confusing the focus. - The proposed transit system is worth examining, but it has several weaknesses, so it should be run only on an experimental basis for a limited period., Fragment: Incomplete sentence that doesn’t express a full thought. - How life is in New York after September 11th., Question: Doesn’t take a stance; phrased as a question. - Should eighteen-year-olds have the right to drink?, Weak language (“I think,” “I believe”): Sounds unsure or overly personal. - In my opinion, Bill Simon and Gray Davis are very similar., Vague or empty words: Uses unclear, meaningless terms like good or bad. - Negative things have resulted from religion being taught in our schools.,

Thesis Statements

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