The line graph illustrates Great Britain, who received the gold medals, won in 4 sports categories during 6 Olympics between 1996 and 2016. - **Great Britain is a group of three countries The countries didn't win gold medals; the athletes from the GB team did.**. It shows how many gold medals the Great Britain Teams won in each of the four Olympic sporting events on the graph., The line graph illustrated the winners who received the gold medals from 4 sports in total 6 Olympics. Between 1996 and 2016. - It doesn't illustrate the winners who received gold medals; it shows how many gold medals Team GB won in the four sporting events., Overall, in the graph shows how dramatically change in cycling sport between 2004 and 2009 has a sharply up in this sport. - **Grammar/ Vocabulary** Overall, the graph shows how dramatically the number of gold medals for cycling rose between 1996 and 2016., To Great Britain cycling represents the most important sport in Olympics. - **'Important' is too subjective. Try** : For Great Britain, cycling represented the highest gold medal count across all the Olympics., By rowing and atheletics, the number of medals won were 2… but there weren’t very important changes until Beijing 2008, … - **Again, avoid the word 'important' AND avoid contractions!** From rowing and athletics, the number of medals won was 2..., but there were not any significant changes until Beijing 2008, ..., Afther that the numbers slightly rose in Sydney 2000 wining 7 medals in total. - **Grammar- numbers cannot win things** After that, the numbers slightly rose in Sydney 2000, with Team Great Britain winning 7 medals in total., At the whole, the most significantly change were cycling and sailing. - **Grammar/ Word Formation**: On the whole, the most significant changes were in the number of cycling and sailing gold medals., ..., whereas the gold medals of cycling and sailing show - **Grammar/ Vocabulary**..., whereas the number of gold medals for cycling and sailing showed a dramatic fluctuation.,
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EOS Writing Task Error Correction- Line Graph Olympic Medals
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